She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
