I'm lost and stupid without you.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
