Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
