your room smells of hookers.
And success
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
