i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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