I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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