i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
