I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
He? As in you personified your dick?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
