he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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