This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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