Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
As shirtless as possible
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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