I must be too annoying 4 u.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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