I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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