Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Of course I have a pirate flag
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Randomize