I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
