batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
