I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
