Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
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