I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
So vagazzling was a success
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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