They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I think a kid would responsible me up
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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