I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
