is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
