Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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