Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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