I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
