Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
