More tranny stories later!
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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