shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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