Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
All the doctor said was why
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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