we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
The ass gains better be worth it
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