Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Randomize
