i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
