Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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