Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
