At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
