Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
