Buhtt sex?
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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