my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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