He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
You ate ashes out of my bong
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
