Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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