It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
