how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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