Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
