Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
sex in a hospital.. check
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
