Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
