the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize
