You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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