And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
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