How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
