I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
